Last week we talked about the importance of self-reflection and taking time for yourself. This week we spoke to Zoe Williams, executive leadership coach. She explained what mindfulness is and how to start practising both in your personal and professional life. 

What’s mindfulness?

“Mindfulness is focusing on fewer things, one thing or nothing, depending on how much you practise it.”

The majority of us rarely focus on just one thing; on the contrary, we are always carrying a lot of thoughts at the same time in our minds. This can lead to exhaustion and stress. 

“Mindfulness is about reducing the number of things that we focus on at a time.”

We are not our thoughts

The first thing to understand is that we are not our thoughts. As Zoe explains, we can think about our thoughts as a radio station. It’s something separate from us, and we can decide whether we listen to it or not and when. 

“Sometimes, at the end of the day, I talk to my friends, and we joke about the wild radio station we had in our minds that day. But then the next day, you will tune in to a different radio station, and your thoughts will be different.” 

And the beauty of it all is that you can always decide how much attention you pay to the “radio”. 

Mindfulness and meditation

Meditation is one of the techniques to practice mindfulness, but it’s not the only one. (More about this below)

When meditating, you usually try to sit very still and slow down the number of nervous system responses being sent to your body. This is why we should preferably sit on the floor, in silence and with our eyes closed. This way, we reduce the amount of sensory input we send to our brains. We also focus on our breathing. 

What meditation does is help slow our nervous systems down and allow our brains to relax. It’s about getting our minds into a restful state without going to sleep. 

“It’s actually better than sleep because you are conscious, and your nervous system is still alert.”

Our nervous system is the one that causes our minds to race, and through our breathing, we can regulate that response. (We talk more about breathing below)

What are the benefits of Mindfulness?

The main benefit of mindfulness is that we allow our nervous system to calm and rest. This is essential because it’s in this calm state that our nervous system focuses on healing.

Our bodies are constantly in a state of restore and repair. If our nervous system continually focuses on the outside and not on healing our bodies, we will suffer from more illnesses and diseases.

Therefore it makes sense that the more we allow our nervous system to focus on the inside, the better we will feel. 

“Practising mindfulness helps to slow our ageing too. I certainly look younger now than in my twenties.”

How can we start?

As mentioned above, meditation is not the only technique we can use to practise mindfulness.

Mindfulness practice is any activity that helps you focus on one thing and stop paying attention to your thoughts. This can be reading, gardening, sudoku, crosswords, baking, sewing, knitting, in essence, anything that helps you turn the volume of the “radio” down. 

Zoe recommends starting with an activity that we already enjoy. “It’s really difficult to create new habits and break old ones, so do something you already enjoy.”

Even going for a walk while listening to a podcast can be a way of practising mindfulness. 

Another great thing about Mindfulness is that once we have mastered it, we can practice it with other people. For example, many people practice it with their kids. You can use any activity and do it together while in silence.

She explains how beautiful and memorable her experience was, living in Tibet with Buddhist monks who practise mindfulness almost all day long. The great thing is that they do it as a community and thrive off of each other, as well as themselves.

Breathing Exercises

We asked Zoe to gives us some advice and exercises to help with our breathing. She mentioned “the box breathing technique”. 

The ideal way to practice this breathing technique is by lying down with your back flat on the floor and your hands on your stomach. The main focus point is that you start centring your breathing from the belly instead of the chest.

We breathe in through our nose and count to 4, hold in for 4, exhale through our mouths for 4, and wait for 4 until the next breath. 

This can make us feel lightheaded initially, which is another reason why it’s good to be lying down. 

We need to understand that the more oxygen we can get into our nervous systems, the safer and calmer we will feel. When we only do diaphragmatic breathing, which is breathing from our chest, we only fill 30 to 40 % of the capacity of our lungs.

This is a shallow type of breathing, usually the one we use when in a fight or flight situation. This sends a signal to our brains that tells it we are in danger and need to be alert. 

When we breathe through our stomach, we take in more oxygen into our lungs, which sends a message to our brains that it’s safe to relax and focus on healing. 

Doing this exercise just ten times has a tremendous effect on our nervous systems and the number of stress hormones that we get rushing through our bodies.

What are some of the biggest challenges when starting with Mindfulness?

“The biggest challenge is getting used to the discomfort of the brain not being able to switch off.”

Actually, when we start practising mindfulness, it’s pretty normal to have more thoughts and find it even more difficult to relax. According to Zoe, this is one of the reasons many people quit mindfulness at the beginning. But this is just the resistance from our brains because they don’t want to be without a job. 

If we think of our brains as a tool, it’s easy to understand that it wants to be helpful. Our brains are designed to solve problems, but most of us, in our everyday lives, have covered the main issues our brains are designed to solve; finding food, for example. So our brains create problems, issues and things to think about. 

“We are addicted to thinking.” 

The most important thing is accepting the fact that our thoughts will always be there, but we don’t need to focus on them. Instead, we can practise mindfulness and focus on something else. 

If we think about watching TV, our thoughts are still there, but we are just not engaging with them. They are running in the background. Our thoughts are there even when we sleep, which is why we dream. 

Zoe uses the example of the “parents filter”. “When you are in a birthday party with many kids shouting and screaming around you, parents can turn down the volume. It’s the same with our thoughts.”

Another big challenge for some people is to set boundaries. It’s quite normal for parents, for example, to feel guilty or selfish if they take time for themselves. Nonetheless, we all need our time just to relax and heal; this will also make us be better in our connections and relationships with others. 

Mindfulness in the workplace

Zoe works with many companies where she implements mindfulness practices. This can be very beneficial for innovation, creating psychological safety and deeper connections between team members. 

The first thing Zoe recommends for companies that want to implement some of these practices is to think about when it’s appropriate to practice mindfulness. 

There are many moments where we need to be reactive, fast in our thinking. This varies depending on the industry too. 

A good time to practice mindfulness within your team is before starting a meeting when you need people to be ready to listen and communicate effectively or when they need to be innovative, creative or feel safe. 

Some of the companies she works for use the box breathing exercise before starting a meeting. She calls it “setting the tone or intention”. As a leader, you need to set the tone and communicate to the rest of the team that now it’s the time to feel safe, relax, and be comfortable in bringing your best ideas and the best version of yourself. This simple exercise can have a dramatic impact on our team members, their confidence and their outputs.

It’s also a good idea for people to use this technique when they have back to back meetings. Taking the time to do 10 or 20 deep breaths between meetings can help our concentration and focus. 

The Optimist View…

Whatever activity feels comfortable for you, there is no doubt that practising mindfulness is beneficial and available to every one of us. 

We should never forget to take care of ourselves. Think about the instructions on the plane “put your mask on first”. The reason is that we need to be safe to help others. 

We can extrapolate the example to our daily lives. If we want to serve others, do our jobs properly and have a fulfilling life, we need to first focus on ourselves. 

Unfortunately, this is not an easy task because the majority of us are hectic and busy.

At Optimist Performance, we help people to overcome their challenges and achieve their full potential. Learn more about how our executive coaching programmes can help you readjust the balance and focus on you and how you fulfil your potential by clicking here. Alternatively, get in touch today and find out how we can help.

About Zoe Williams

Zoe Williams is the Founder of Luminary Mindset where she helps leaders to elevate the Emotional Intelligence (EI) culture of their organisations.

Learn more about Zoe and Luminary Mindset here.

The post How to start practising Mindfulness – Interview with Zoe Williams appeared first on Optimist Performance.

Breaking the harmony between our work and personal lives negatively impacts both the individual and the team. According to statistics, it can decrease employee morale by 68%, reduce productivity by 36% and significantly reduce turnover. It will also make us feel stressed, overwhelmed and frustrated. Furthermore, it will impact our personal lives and relationships. 

It is important for us to accept that there is no one size that fits all when it comes to work-life balance and many factors will impact the amount of time each individual spends at work. 

The critical part is to understand your circumstances and how you feel about them. For example, if you’re constantly putting work first or working longer hours, and this makes you feel stressed, overwhelmed, and burnt-out, then you need to re-evaluate your situation. 

In addition, due to remote working, many people have seen their work-life balance threatened. However, working from home shouldn’t be an excuse to forget about work-life balance. On the contrary, it should be used as a way to achieve a better one. 

Remember that we are working from home, not living at the office.

Having a work-life balance can be challenging when we identify too much with our job. This is a bigger problem for Millenials. According to a study, 68% admit they suffer from “workism” or identify themselves through their jobs.

While our careers and professional growth are important; our personal lives, relationships and health must always be top priorities. 

Tips to achieve a better work-life balance:

Protect yours and other’s time

We all know that we shouldn’t look at our emails when we are not working and switching our notifications off should be a no brainer.

Still, many of us look at work-related messages in our free time and once we see them, our minds automatically go back to work mode, disrupting our rest time. 

Changing this is ultimately up to each one of us. However, trying to leave your phone in a different room, or at least switching off your notifications, can be a good start. 

Although the ultimate decision is personal, we should avoid invading someone else’s personal time. This is even more important for company leaders and managers. 

According to research, due to remote working, 53% of the people feel they have to be available at all times.

So, we need to be conscious of other people’s time—no emails or messages after working hours. If you work at different times, you can always schedule your emails to send when you know other people are working.

Or at least you should make your expectations clear and let people know you’re not expecting them to answer or even read your email at those times. 

Use communication to identify and enhance work-life balance  

Sometimes it can be difficult to realise or even admit that we feel stressed. But we can all look for the signs of burnout. For example, binge-watching can be a sign of burnout and stress. 

Also, leaders and managers need to be conscious of their non-verbal communication. Our actions always speak louder than our words. Showing that you value work-life balance is critical. Let people know it’s ok to disconnect and that they don’t need to be available 24/7. 

Use your data right

In the same way, we can find cues of burnout from our everyday life; we can also get them from our data. For example, many companies monitor people’s computers to make sure they are working when they have to, but are rarely concerned about if they are working in their free time.

40% of employees use their devices for work outside business hours.

If you tell your employees when they have to work, you should also see the other side of the coin and make sure they are not working when they are not supposed to.

Use transition activities 

A transition activity is a task that helps you switch to relax mode. For example, a person in our team uses a transition activity at the end of the day. It allows her to put her mind at ease by reassuring herself that she did everything and it’s ok to finish. 

You can also use these types of activities within your team to make sure people switch off on weekends. For example, organising a social activity during the last 15 or 30 minutes of the Friday shift can be a great idea. This way, people know that they should finish by that time. Also, playing something together can help shift their modes to off time. 

As much as our muscles need recovery times, so do our brains. So, disconnecting on weekends is essential for our mental health and work-life balance. 

Have set work hours 

If your job requires you to be available at certain hours, setting up a schedule can be pretty straightforward but for people who can do their jobs any time, it’s still important to have a plan and define working hours. 

You can distribute those hours any way you want and organise your time according to your needs whilst still managing to have a routine. Setting work hours is vital to ensure that you don’t end up working all day every day. 

Be realistic and prioritise yourself 

Ultimately, everyone is different and has different needs, so being self-aware and analysing the past can help you improve your work-life balance in the future. 

When you know your needs, it’s easier to prioritise them. Also, evaluating what impacted your work-life balance in the past can help you avoid making the same mistakes. 

Last but not least, we all need to learn to say no. Being truthful with your colleagues and knowing when you can’t afford to accept any more workload is key to achieve work-life balance. Leaders need to understand and set boundaries where people feel comfortable saying no when needed. 

Improve productivity 

Sometimes longer hours are due to an overload of work but it can also be due to a lack of productivity. So one way to stop overworking is to increase how productive you are. Check out our blog from last week, where we have 7 tips on how to improve productivity. 

The Optimist view…

We all need to find our balance, but we shouldn’t compare ourselves to others. We are all at different times in our lives, both personal and professional, which means our needs will vary. 

An essential take-home point when talking about work-life balance is finding the balance that works for you, even if people disagree. In the end, it’s your life, not theirs. 

What does work-life balance mean to you? And what do you do to ensure it?

The post 7 Tips To Have A Better Work-Life Balance – By Optimist Performance appeared first on Optimist Performance.